[Get inspired by a weekly roundup on living well, made simple. Sign up for CNN’s Life, But Better newsletter for information and tools designed to improve your well-being.
Suzy Hopkins’ life was suddenly turned upside down after 30 years of marriage. Her husband left her to get back together with a former girlfriend, a marriage counselor. Hopkins grappled with a roller coaster of emotions – disbelief, sadness, anger, and confusion.
She and her daughter, Hallie Bateman, decided to turn their experience into a new graphic novel, “What to Do When You Get Dumped: A Guide to Unbreaking Your Heart.” The book offers an intimate look into the complex emotions of losing someone who once played a pivotal role in your life.
Through a chronological countdown over the time it took Hopkins to recover, the pair created a heartfelt guide that blends practical advice with humor, helping those on a healing journey to recognize they are worthy of love.
CNN: What inspired you to share your breakup and grief for a larger audience?
Hopkins: I started interviewing strangers about what they learned from going through a breakup, and it struck me that people really understood what I was going through and plenty of others must be experiencing the same thing. I began to write as an exercise for getting through the grief. After I started writing, the feelings hurt so much, but it ended up being a pathway through it.
CNN: Was it challenging to be vulnerable about the humiliation, depression, and resentment you experienced after your husband left?
Hopkins: It was very hard and painful. I’m a lifelong journalist, reporter, and editor, but my big hope is that this book is helpful to somebody else. There were a lot of tears along the way because to process and put my experience in writing – even though I used humor – is painful.
CNN: Can people understand the feelings of relationship grief, even if they are not currently going through a breakup?
Bateman: We talk about the grief of losing someone (who dies), and it’s understood why a person is so devastated. There’s not as much acknowledgment of the validity and seriousness of grieving the loss of a relationship.
CNN: What is a common misconception about going through a breakup?
Hopkins: People underestimate the grief that accompanies a breakup and how long it could take to accept it. When I got divorced, I finally understood all the pain that my friends went through, and I realized I had been a bad friend because I thought so many marriages just fell by the wayside.
CNN: What do you hope your audience takes away from your experience?
Hopkins: I hope this book brings some joy. I was 58 when my husband left, and I’m 65 now. My whole world was this one person, and I have never felt as alone as I did when my world went away. It can be hard to find people who will tolerate listening to you mourn the loss of your relationship.
Bateman: I think about the book’s dedication that my mom wrote, which says, “If you need a thread of hope to mend a tattered heart, this book is for you.” I hope that readers walk away with hope and feel encouraged to move forward.
CNN: What lessons did you learn from writing this book?
Hopkins: In my marriage, I felt like I was part of a two-person entity. Once my husband was gone, I suddenly felt like I was just half of myself. What I learned along the way is that this life is mine to shape and that it can be hard when you’ve been in a partnership. It’s up to you to find your path.
Bateman: When your world implodes and you have to pick up the pieces, you wouldn’t wish that kind of pain on anyone. But the lesson that I’ve taken from this book is that we’re so much stronger than we give ourselves credit for, and it’s been transformative for me to have this thread of hope in my mom’s journey after the divorce.
Source link